A true legend.

Well the news just came down that the great Paul Newman has passed away. Stage, live television and film, Newman could do it all. No one played the likable rogue better (not so fast Kevin Costner). Find me an actor today that has his body of work, drives race cars, opens summer camps for ailing children and owns a hugely succesful charitable business. You throw down, "Hud", "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid", "Cool Hand Luke", "The Hustler", "The Verdict" and of course, "Slap Shot", then you contributed. He will be missed.

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wow

I didn't get a chance to watch the Katie Couric / Sarah Palin interview when it originally aired, but because of the wonders of this "internet" thingy I have been able to watch several of the exchanges. Like this one:

It would appear that everyone's favorite beauty queen/

sports reporter/faith healer/vice-presidential candidate had a tough time of it.

So you wanna vote for a guy who voted for her? 

Good luck with that.

s

Bush spoke to the nation last night. Let me give you the breakdown, although by now we should all know the tune.

"If we don't BLANK (fill in hastily thrown together, questionable plan of action) now, then we will most certainly BLANK (insert any fearful image here, mushroom cloud, another 9/11, economic collapse)". 

But like the American auto makers will tell you, you can only sell a crappy product for so long before the public just stops buying.

s

News Flash...

Stop the presses!

That's one more off of my list of unanswered questions...Whew! Now I can get on to the other 700 billion more important issues we have to deal with.

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Do what now?

Whew...

I've written a few large checks in my life, back taxes, back child support, back massage, but I can only imagine what signing a 700 billion dollar bailout check would feel like. What do you put in the "Memo" line? Do you sign with red ink? So many questions.

Apparently the deal isn't going done as smooth as Bush and Paulson had hoped. One reason could be a small section of the agreement..32 words as a matter of fact.

"Decisions by the Secretary pursuant to the authority of this Act are non-reviewable and committed to agency discretion, and may not be reviewed by any court of law or any administrative agency."

Really? We give you 700 billion dollars and do what, wave goodbye? Hope for the best?  All of this happens on your watch, all the while you're telling us things are fine, and then once the walls start to crumble you not only want a large check but also absolute immunity? Really?

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le view

You know for a show that quite honestly I cannot stand, "The View" finally did something today that I have to give them props for. John McCain dropped by today for what I can only assume he thought would be the usual fluff fest and a chance to score some easy women votes.

The girls had other ideas. (watch videos)

I love to watch noted right wing nut, Elisabeth Hasselbeck as she grinds her back molars into chalk while her candidate (as well as his wife) are actually being called out right in front of her. Earlier this month, Hasselbeck had hosted a luncheon for Cindy McCain and I'm sure they both thought today's show was going to be more of a cake walk.

Good for you ladies. Respect.

s

today

You were in charge when it happened.

You avoided responsibility

You promised to capture the man responsible.

You failed.

You now claim that if the other party wins, they would allow it to happen again, only this time, they would be responsible.

You should be ashamed.

You won't be.

s

Drill Baby Drill!

Well now. 

It appears that those crazy cats over at the Interior Department Agency know how to conduct themselves some business. The agency that collects oil and gas royalties has been caught in a wide-ranging ethics scandal, one that includes " allegations of financial self-dealing, accepting gifts from energy companies, cocaine use and sexual misconduct."

Do those guys know how to party or what? The investigation concludes that several of the officials (Government Officials by the way, so the "official" Officials): "frequently consumed alcohol at industry functions, had used cocaine and marijuana, and had sexual relationships with oil and gas company representatives”. 

Now that's what I call horizontal drilling!

And that is what they found out! Imagine the stuff still tucked away..deep in the Alaska wilderness, just like so many of our future energy solutions.

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"A famous philosopher once said..."

...is a horrible way to start a speech. I hate it. If the philosopher is so famous, then name him. I hear it time and time again and you know the speaker is using this as a way to force the theme of the speech down your throat. What theme you ask? Well just wait for the second sentence, because it is coming. For example:

"A famous philosopher once said, 'you may fool all of the people some of the time, you can even fool some of the people all of the time, but you can never fool all of the people all of the time'...(pause)...well my friends, Bill Jones never tried to fool anyone...

please stop this. I mean it.

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brilliant...

If you haven't been watching "The Daily Show" this week, you have really been missing out. The gang is as sharp as ever.




This is why they do what they do and I sell hot dogs all day in the sweltering sun. All right, I don't sell hot dogs all day in the sweltering sun...but I can dream can't I?

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Conventional wisdom....

As I listen to the Republican National Convention this week, I am left with a few questions.

- If you are the true party of reform and change, my only question is reform what? Change what? Don't you have to admit that something is wrong first? And if nothing is wrong, then why do we need a pair of reformers to try and change something that isn't broken in the first place?

- If this convention is about McCain's military record and the fact that he served his country, then shouldn't that have mattered in '04 when John Kerry was the candidate with the military record? Shouldn't you have been offended when the Bush campaign "Swift Boated" him?

- If McCain is a true "maverick", then why didn't he push for his VP choice, Joe Liberman? Or his other choices, Tom Ridge, Mitt Romney etc.. Instead, he bowed to pressure from the religious right and picked a more hard right candidate.

- Is McCain a POW? I had no idea. They should really talk about that.

- Where is anyone from the current administration? Anyone? How the mighty have fallen.

- If Palin has made more "Executive" decisions than both Obama and Biden, then how many said decisions has McCain made? By that same logic, Palin is the better choice for president.

- Are we still using the same old "Washington Fat Cats/Angry left/liberal left/liberal elite/hollywood elite" line of rhetoric? I know the right needs a Bogey man, but can you not find a new one?

- make no mistake, I like John McCain. I may have voted for him in 2000, when the republican party tried everything they could do to bury him. Then, somewhere along the way, McCain seemed to change. Less "Straight Talk" and more party line.

- I have printed up a few thousand "Drill Baby Drill" T-shirts. Let me know what size. Please hurry.

s 

OMG...HCWNE!

Hello all,

The above photo is from a wonderful time waste of a blog, (other than mine).

http://hotchickswithnoeyebrows.blogspot.com/

Take care of those eyebrows ladies..please.

s

"I lived long enough and I ain't scared of dying."

I walked 47 miles of barbed wire,
Used a cobra snake for a neck tie.
Got a brand new house on the roadside,
Made out of rattlesnake hide.
I got a brand new chimney made on top,
Made out of human skulls.
Now come on darling let's take a little walk, tell me,
Who do you love?
Who do you love?
Who do you love?
Who do you love?

One of the fathers of rock and roll, Bo Diddley died yesterday at the age of 79. Playing a guitar he made himself, Bo Diddley created one of the greatest "beats" in rock and roll. Impossible to describe in text, the "Bo Diddley beat" in my opinion is one of the foundations of rock and roll music. Thanks Bo.

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Where everybody claims to know my name...

Hello all,

Good news as my favorite watering hole was picked by Esquire magazine as one of the best bars in America.









This is the picture that Esquire took, but it may as well be called "Shane's point of view" as I try to sit there whenever I go in. If you are looking for great burgers, drafts and bar staff, and the quirkiest collection of patrons, then this is the place for you.


s

That's Hedley...

Hello all,

Sad news from Los Angeles as news that Harvey Korman died. He was 81.



I was always a fan of Mr. Korman and never felt he received the credit he deserved in regards to his work on the Carol Burnett show as well as his film work with Mel Brooks. But in my opinion, there is no "Blazing Saddles" without Mr. Korman's brilliant work as the character Hedley Lamar. The work he does in each scene is a perfect balance of physical and this intense seething you feel his character has just below the surface. As close to perfect as you can get in my book.









On "The Carol Burnett Show", I always felt that Tim Conway always received far to much credit while Korman received too little as the straight man to Conway's incessant mugging. Gene Wilder and Harvey Korman have always been two of my favorite comedic actors of all time and my guess is that Mel Brooks would agree since he cast them both in almost everything he did. Thanks Harvey, you will be missed.

s

She speaks...

Hello all,

As some of you may already know, Nancy Reagan officially endorsed Republican candidate John McCain. This means that I have once again lost in the "Former First Lady Endorsements" pool. I thought for sure she would endorse one of the other..oh wait, there are no other candidates. So why did she wait weeks after he had the nomination sewn up to speak? Why is this news? Why is this news?

s

SXSW wrap up

Hello all,

Well I've been back home now for a couple of days. Still processing all of the info and events from the past few days. My brain is hurting as it deals with words like "Crowd Sourcing", "Wikis", "Ciphers", R&A", "P&A", "Torrent", "Track back", "Aggregators", "DRMs", "VOD" and "RSS", just to name a few. From my personal experience, a good time was had. This has to be one of the better organized festivals that I've ever been to and I can't imagine a more perfect host city. Thanks Austin!

Now that I'm back in the real world, it's back to political races, prostitution rings, economic recession, taxes and war.

forget this..I'm heading back to Austin.

s

SXSW Day 4

Hello all,

Typing a little slow today gang. After an afternoon of panels and one really good film, I went to a few patties last night.

The first party was the VH1 Rock Docs (I know, cheesy title). This party was to support the documentary featuring Bela Fleck and his trip to Africa. For those of you that don't know, Bela Fleck is a highly respected banjo player and has appeared on many albums. His trip to Africa was to actually trace back the origins of the banjo. The party invite claimed food, drinks and a performance by Bela, so I was really looking forward to it. Well, the line to get in was very long and they moved through that BBQ buffet like a school of piranhas eating whatever it is that piranhas eat. I managed to grab a drumstick and a little potato salad. As I scanned the audience for a place to eat my din, i noticed a familiar face in the crowd. That face belonged to none other than Jeffrey Tambor! I'm a huge fan of his work, going all the way back to his guest spots on "Hill Street Blues". Also in the audience was Morgan Spurlock of "Super Size Me". Bela got on stage and performed a few numbers and he did not disappoint...a true virtuoso. They had a camera locked off on the stage so that they could project on a big screen behind the stag all the monitors in the bar. I was actually standing at the back of the stage, so I could not see the big screen. But I looked over at one of the monitors and realized that from where I was standing I had been on camera this entire time, so on this giant big screen the only two people on the screen were myself and Bela ...rocking the house.

From there I moved to the "Technicolor" party. More food and open bar. Met some nice folks. Did I mention the open bar?

I would like to say the night ended there..it didn't. A friend from home was also in town, so bars were in order. It's like this town is trying to hurt me.

Woke up this morning to a huge storm blowing through. It has been raining all day. So you combine the cloudy weather with late night parties and Starbucks is doing great business today.

Well gang, off to another panel. more later

s

SXSW Day three

Hello all,

It is Sunday in Austin. A little overcast today, but Austin still shines through (Awww..so sweet). I actually broke away from the panels long enough to go see a film. The documentary "Beautiful Losers" was playing at the wonderful downtown theater the Paramount. The Paramount is a beautifully restored old one screen theater in the heart of downtown. If in Austin and a film lover, you have to check it out.

The film was about a collection of artists who all got together in New York in the late eighties and lived together in an abandoned building as they converted it into this alternative art gallery. The artists drew on everything for inspiration, graffiti, skateboarding, punk.all things street. The doc chronicles their initial struggles to survive to their eventual struggles with fame and fortune. A really well done film.

Going to try some more parties tonight, (it never stops for the Shanester..2 beers and zzzz)

more later

s

South by Southwest day 1

hello all,

I'm writing this post in downtown Austin, host of the SXSW Film, Music and Interactive festival. This has to be one of the better festivals in the country. Everything from the films to the panels to the parties has been (so far) really great.

I went to the opening night party last night at a bar on the famous 6th street, famous because this downtown street is lined with bars and restaurants and can get very rowdy and last night was no exception. Last night's party was hosted by A&E and consisted of two major party favors, open bar and free buffet. Thank you A&E!

As usual, one sees a lot of self promotion at these things and this year is no different. So many people walking around talking into their cameras, staging scenes, interviewing people etc. everyone is in their own little movies. During a film conference panel this morning, I watched a guy from the audience video tape himself asking a question to the panel all the while plugging his website. By the time he was done, I had forgotten the question.

That's all for now, off to another party and more free grub. I think I have three lined up tonight and more Sunday and Monday. At some point, I should probably see a film.

more tomorrow!

s

nazi gold..

Hello all,

I have to admit, I'm a real sucker for stories of buried treasure. Like many kids, I dreamed of finding a hidden map and going of on an exciting treasure hunt. For that reason, I believe that Indiana Jones, in my opinion, is the greatest action hero ever created for the screen and the best moments in that franchise are when Mr. Jones fights the greatest of all movie villains, the Nazi as they attempt to plunder Europe of all things valuable. Tales of hidden vaults, caves and mine shafts filled with Nazi booty, (German strip club joke here) have always been the stuff of legend. That is until today.

It seems that a group of German treasure hunters have found a cavern that contains gold stolen from St. Petersburg. The location of the man-made cavern were found in an old notebook belonging to the deceased grandfather of one of the hunters.

Good stuff.


s

Hall of Fame

Hello all,



If there is a Photoshop hall of fame, then the following piece would get my vote.






















This is laugh out loud funny for so many reasons. Comedy wise it may be as close to perfection as one can get, concept, excecution..brilliant.


s

where's the beef?

People, people, people,

Look I know we are all concerned with the current beef scare, and I understand that fear. No one wants to know that the meat they are eating is contaminated, I know I don't. But we all have to understand that this is just another media created story with the sole intention of frightening the citizens of this fine country.

Now, on the surface it may not look good, 143 million pounds of beef recalled because of supposed health code violations. And yes they have actual video of sick and crippled cattle being beaten, shocked and in some cases shoved by a forklift because they were too sick to stand, but this video was obviously taken by some cow-hugging, left leaning liberal who is trying to take away jobs. Yes, it is true that the footage also showed water being forcibly pumped down a fallen cow’s mouth...but hey, we don't care what it looks like alive right? We just care what it looks like on a bun!

Now I think the best thing we can all do is go back to what we have always done..ignoring the issue all together. I know they were sick and dying before they were killed, but that shouldn't affect the quality of the meat should it?

See you at the drive through!

s

Wild and Crazy....

Hello all,

I've just finished the new Steve Martin book, "Born Standing Up: A Comics Life". I'm typically a very slow reader, but I ripped through this book in a couple of days. It's a really, really interesting read and a must for anyone with an interest in comedy.

I have always been a casual fan of Steve Martin, he was never was the type of comedian that I naturally related to, until that is I read this book. Martin describes in great detail the work that he put into shaping his stand up act and forever changed my opinion of him. When you read the number of shows on the road, the number of appearances he made on television before he made any real impact, it's staggering.

"I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining and four were spent in wild success."

then he walked away and never returned. A really good read.

Now Mr. Martin, about those movies

s

misc...

Hello all,

grab bag today.

Really interesting online photo gallery courtesy of National Geographic and photograper Vincent Laforet. The topic is the "drying of the west". Some of the photos of lush green golf courses in the middle of the desert, where it is the only thing growing for hundreds of miles really make you question the logic. I remember flying into places like Phoenix and Las Vegas and looking down at all of these plush lawns and golf courses and wondering why one would move to the desert and expect to not live in the desert? But hey, as long as I can get a little golf year round, what's a few million gallons of water right? Ahh, the hubris.

I don't know about you, but I have really become excited about this political race. Now I know the system is flawed, too much money, soft or otherwise, too many lobbyists etc, but the idea of a change is really refreshing. We've been down for so long in this country that I really feel a buzz in the air that something good could happen. Then again, when you are coming from the worst administration in history it doesn't take much to excite you.

I hate to do this, but I have to laugh when the Britney Spears camp is blaming the manager for her erratic behavior. Remember when she was a kid and the mom and others ran the show? Then she had to break away from that, show the world that she was her own person only to now once again blame someone else for her actions. She's running out of people to blame. Again, sorry about the TMZing of this blog. I'll never do it again..unless my Svengali like manager forces me to do so.

s

Super Bowl predictions

hello all,

I usually don't do this, but I've received so many requests for my super bowl predictions.

Alright here it is...I'm going against of the so called "sports experts" when I say..

New York Giants 17, New England patriots 14. The MVP will be Eli Manning.

s

Shopping tips

hello all,

For those who don't know, I am what some people might consider "cheap". I would rather use the term "thrifty" or "frugal", but "thrifty" doesn't get your family making the squeaky sound effect when you open your own wallet or the claims that the George Washington printed on my money is actually wearing sunglasses, (because he's not used to the sunlight..doesn’t get out much). It also doesn't help that my family are all Borscht belt comedians.

Now it is true that I like to look for a good bargain, it just makes good sense to me. This has usually served me well in the past...but sometimes it can backfire. I discovered this the other day while in the bathroom, taking care of some necessary business, (much like the cute bears in the Charmin toilet paper spot answering the eternal question, "Do bears (expletive deleted) in the woods) Segue here. I reached over to tear off the necessary amount of T.P, only to have it tear away in shreds. I tried again only to have the same thing happen. Maybe I didn't use enough force, this time I'll really give it a tug. As I watched the roll fly through the air, unraveling along the way, I knew something was amiss. It was only as I rolled the paper back on the roll that I realized that my bargain toilet paper wasn't perforated. It was just one long spool of solid paper. Imagine the roll of paper on top of an adding machine. Now imagine trying to use said paper to wipe your bear bottom with (Charmin callback) and you understand my struggle. What started with me just trying to help my bottom line end with me just hurting my bottom*.

s

*I realize that I'm a grown man saying "bottom". These are difficult times.

the surge

hello all,

disturbing news out of Iraq where remote controlled explosives were strapped to two mentally retarded women and detonated in a crowded market killing at least 73 people.

wow.

Regardless of what you think about the success of the surge, (I think too little too late) one has to wonder how that region ever gets back to some semblance of normalcy.

s

Politics

Hello all,

Well, apparently the political race is heating up. Here are the items as I see them:

1) Mitt (giggle) Romney and John McCain are currently claiming the other is a liberal. I believe the week before, they were both trying to out patriot the other.

2) George Bush gave the state of the union speech last night. By all accounts that I've read, very uninspired and flat. Here is an excerpt from the transcript:

(APPLAUSE DIES DOWN. PRESIDENT APPROACHES MICROPHONE, CLEARS THROAT)

BUSH: "DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHH....."

(APPLAUSE)

BUSH: "DUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHH..."

3) Obama has received the support and endorsements of not one but two Kennedys. Apparently this is sending the Clinton campaign into over drive and Bill seems to be taking the gloves off. I find it amusing that one of Bill's tactics is to try to drive home the lack of experience Obama has and that what we need now is less inspiration and more perspiration. I seem to recall Mr. Bill using the "inspirational fresh faced bringer of hope" angle when he went against Bush Sr. Now, Clinton is playing the role of the entrenched career politician afraid of change. I actually like Bill Clinton, but he is wrong here. Now is not the time for democratic payback..you had that chance in '04 and you guys were quivering in fear. The country now needs to move forward and right now it seems that Obama is delivering that message.

next..back to the silly

s

Mein taxes...

Hello all,

A light one this morning. I'm in the process of working on my taxes so I'm vacillating between crying over what I made last year/questioning my life choices and procrastinating on the internet.

This is about a week old, but still hilarious and brilliant.



back to the books.

s

Sports Talk

Hello all,

Let it never be said that I don't touch the sports page:












I love these guys..so laid back..so just talkin sports..like you and I. Look they have everything, wacky characters a casual font, a frosty mug of beer and a male model...sign me up.

Sports item #1- In Dallas Cowboys news, (my team) If former coach Bill Parcells was such a bad guy to work for and new coach Wade Phillips is such a breath of fresh air and such a great guy to work for, then why oh why are all of his coaching staff leaving to go work for Parcells? Sorry, my 13 and 3 schedule only to lose the first game in the playoffs bitter pill is still lodged in the back of my throat..tough to swallow.

Sports item #2 - Just as I predicted, Roger Federer is proving to be the loser I thought he would be.
Now granted, it took him 10 straight Grand slam finals and 19 straight wins in Australia to finally prove my point, but the important thing is that I'm right. (Note: favorite sports title regarding this story: "You got Serbed!"..my guess is that the other guy is of Serbian decent)

No football this weekend. Malls everywhere will be filled with silent desperation as husbands and fathers are being forced to interact with their families.

The Roast - Now I understand the concept of the Friar's Club Roast back in the day. A group of comics taking shots at each other behind closed doors. heck, I even remember the Dean Martin Roasts on television. But in these hyper-media, days that we live in with cell phone cameras and all that, why in the world would you risk doing them at all? Well the folks over at ESPN felt that it was worth the risk and the results as usual were mixed, and by mixed I mean hilarious.


Meet ESPN Co-Host, Dana Jacobson. Dana thought it would be a great idea to swill vodka from a bottle (see pic) and scream expletives about Notre Dame during her speech, (to be honest, who hasn't from time to time). Apparently, the head coach of Notre Dame in attendance was not amused.

that's it sports fans. Next time we'll go to the phones.

s

blast from the past

hello all,

I remember watching this newscast oh so many years ago. What started as a typical "Winter is Here" type of news story, ended in local broadcast history. The two male anchors, Tracy Rowlett and the late great Chip Moody were behind their desk in the toasty warm studio while female reporter, Valerie Williams was sent out to cover the severe cold front arriving in the Texas panhandle. What occurred next was nothing short of classic.



What can not be seen with the poor image quality is that as poor Valerie spoke, the viewers could see strands of spittle dangle from her frozen mouth. What helped elevate this to classic status was that this occurred before YouTube or anything else, so once it happened, it wouldn't be seen again until many years later.

s